From the category archives:

sense of self

The Best Balm (even works on yet more stitches)

August 19, 2010

The anxiety began, I’m pretty sure, a couple of Fridays ago, the day I took Lily to the doctor to check on the brand spanking new set of stitches put into her forehead by the lovely resident in the emergency room.
The doctor was a nice man, we had a nice chat, and he declared Lily [...]

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Summertime and the Land of When Things Calm Down

July 26, 2010

I’m nearing the end of Michael Chabon’s book of essays, Manhood for Amateurs.   I’ve been reading it for about two months now, approximately the average amount of time it takes me to finish a book since Lily has decided that if I am going to read while waiting for her to fall asleep I [...]

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Girls’ Night Out

June 1, 2010

When my friend Teri invited me to a girls’ night, my first idea of what to do was panic.
There was a time when I was all about the girls’ night out.  When I believed in a sort of aggressive-defensive-sexy Woman Power and cosmopolitans and thinking my friends and I looked like the gals in Sex [...]

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Little Shifts, Big Changes

May 20, 2010

Although Lily has been walking for over a week now, she does not yet view it as a mode of transportation.  Walking, for her, is a game that starts with a parent placing her at one end of the living room and yelling with great excitement, “Walk to Jake! Walk to Jake!”  It is unclear [...]

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Full Circle

April 19, 2010

I’ve been writing YogaMamaMe since Jake was younger than Lily is now.
This makes me think a lot of things:  How quickly time passes when you have kids.  How scary it is to watch time pass so quickly, especially when you have kids.  And how I seem to be repeating myself.
Take last night, for instance.  I [...]

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Passeaster

April 6, 2010

Last week I did something I am pretty sure I’ve never done before — I threw a seder on Tuesday (does one “throw” a seder?) and I put together Easter baskets for Sunday.  (Actually, Jake and Lily got Easter baskets and the rest of the folks visiting got some perfectly serviceable Easter bags, but who’s [...]

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Lily Goes Full-Time

January 4, 2010

Today is Lily’s first day of full-time daycare.
Just writing it is making me cry again.  (As is wandering past my bedroom and the empty bed on which she is not napping and knowing that I will not have that unspeakably joyful moment of my day when she first wakes up from her nap and grins [...]

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The Co-Sleeper Is Gone … And Time Marches On

November 30, 2009

Next to my side of the bed there is a large, clean(ish) patch of floorboards.  On the other side of that large, clean(ish) patch of floorboards there is room to open the drawers on the left side of my dresser.  In between there is space for my discarded shoes and socks to breathe without having [...]

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Are We There Yet? (Part Two: Preschool Version)

August 18, 2009

Today was the end-of-the-school year potluck in Jake’s preschool class.  Same summer-ish excitement that I recall from the end of my somewhat-older-than-two-and-a-half-years-old school years.  Same excuse to eat ice cream instead of lunch.  Same sense of happy displacement at having parents on the playground in the middle of the day.
Plus, as a mother, a little [...]

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Busy with Baby: Me, Myself, and My Baby Who Demands All of Both

May 28, 2009

We have reached that precious stage of infancy where Lily is alive to everything around her, singing out the sounds of conversation to us, staying awake longer between naps, and not looking quite so ridiculous in teeny tiny little dresses.  This can mean only one thing:
Just when I have the most to write about I [...]

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What Happened to My Yoga Practice?: Lamentations of a Postpartum Mom

May 22, 2009

I was initially kind of excited when I sat down to breakfast this morning and discovered an article in the New York Times Style section about a yoga class I attended a few times.
It felt like a brush with celebrity, an acknowledgment of a past life maybe not steeped in but occasionally brushing up against [...]

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Is There Such a Thing as a Full Circle and What Does It Look Like?

May 1, 2009

I hung up the phone yesterday thinking I had come full circle.
We hadn’t spoken in nearly twenty years, and I wonder how long it’s been since I’ve heard the laugh that brought me right back in a joyful slide to the summer I turned seventeen.  That laugh, I now remember, made me feel like I’d [...]

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What I Learned in My First Mommy and Me Yoga Class

April 15, 2009

I’ve had this day marked on my calendar for weeks.  My first Mommy and Me yoga class.
It’s been just two days since Lily officially reached the Age Where I Can Take Her Into Public Places, and the prospect of the class was even more exciting to me than Monday’s foray into Target.  Purchasing diapers and [...]

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Alice in Motherland, or Just How Hard It Is

April 14, 2009

Yesterday afternoon, I was like the Cheshire Cat, grinning and purring contentedly about how smoothly the first four weeks of Lily’s life have slid by.
Yesterday evening, I was Alice herself, “shedding gallons of tears, until there was a large pool all round her, about four inches deep, and reaching half down the hall.”  Unlike Alice, [...]

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My Refuge

April 6, 2009

On Friday afternoon, I was lucky enough to be invited to the dedication of a lovely meditation space in downtown Asheville, the WriteMind Institute.  And even more lucky to have a mother-in-law in town and an infant feeding schedule that allowed me to attend.
It felt pretty darned great to take a shower, put on real [...]

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I Like Pink

April 3, 2009

It occurs to me as I type in the title of this piece that I may generate hits from some fans of the singer Pink.  Who seems like a perfectly nice person but isn’t the pink I’m talking about.  On the other hand, I find it fortuitous to have the opportunity to declare “I like [...]

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Feeding My Child without Starving My Soul

March 26, 2009

When I was pregnant with Jake I received a mysterious “congratulations, new mom!” package in the mail from a company whose name looked vaguely familiar to me.  Nestled inside the box were two shiny blue and white cans of Similac formula.
I was appalled.  Outraged.  And yet too lazy to pack them up and send them [...]

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Is a Toddler in the Lap Worth an Infant Who Can’t Sleep?

March 22, 2009

I had a hour of heaven in front of the television last night.
Normally, I don’t think of anything having to do with watching television as particularly heavenly, unless it involves putting my pregnant feet up for an hour of total rest before picking up my son from preschool.  Those days, however, are no longer with [...]

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The Sweet Times, and Remembering to Savor Them

March 3, 2009

“Enjoy this sweet time as a family of three,” the midwife said to me at the end of our appointment on Friday.
Of course, I panicked.
Was she suggesting that life for Jake was about to be rendered far from sweet?  Soured?  Curdled?  Bitter enough to take away his constant smiles and laughter and remarkable goofiness?
I’ve never [...]

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When the Glamour Is Gone: How a Pregnant Mother of a Toddler Watches the Oscars

February 24, 2009

Like Kate Winslet, I, too, used to practice my Oscar acceptance speech in front of the mirror when I was eight years old.
But I don’t any longer.  Instead, last night I propped my swollen ankles up on a few pillows, threw an old baby blue blanket over my wriggling belly, and polished off the organic [...]

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