From the monthly archives:

April 2008

When It Takes Effort to Experience Effortlessness

April 30, 2008

“I made that,” I marveled, not for the first time, as I watched Jake at school this morning. He was banging two farm animal puzzle pieces together, making a loud clacking noise appreciated by no one but himself. His eyes were clear and as blue as his shirt, which hung over the top [...]

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Being Patient with Your Practice

April 29, 2008

Yesterday, I wrote about how I had managed to stop moving for an afternoon and how being still showed me there was a lot more time than I thought.
When I finished, I gave a deep, happy sigh. It was just after noon. A whole afternoon stretched ahead of me, free of urgency or [...]

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How I’m Learning to Take More Naps

April 28, 2008

I took a nap with Jake yesterday.
It was an overcast day, and a cool breeze with the smell of rain puffed through the open window. Jake and I were wrapped up together in my duvet. I’d had a lovely, strong home yoga practice that morning while Jake had pedaled about the park with [...]

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How Losing a Little Bit of What’s Central to You Can Be Kind of Centering

April 26, 2008

It hit me somewhere around the time I was half-heartedly kicking my right foot up toward a handstand in the middle of the room. Something had radically changed in my life.
Part of it was that I wasn’t trying very hard. I had resigned myself to never, ever having the courage to attempt a [...]

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Respecting Your Body (and, of course, your child’s) in a World That Doesn’t

April 24, 2008

Boy, you think you’re a careful, concerned parent doing everything anyone could to ensure that your child will never contract autism or cancer or any of the other scary diseases that seem to lurk everywhere in our toxic world, and along come abundant assurances that you could be doing so very much more. It’s [...]

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Surrendering When You Can’t Decide How to Put Your Child to Sleep (or How to Make Some Other Important Parenting Decision)

April 23, 2008

The worst part of lying awake in bed at 4:30 this morning listening to Mike’s deep sleep breaths was not knowing if I’d done the right thing.
I’ll bet we all have that one area of parenting that refuses to yield a clear course of action. No matter what we decide, we find ourselves wondering [...]

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Sometimes It’s in Your Nature to Take Your Toddler to Play at the Mall

April 22, 2008

A good friend told me yesterday how difficult she finds it to spend a whole day entertaining her twenty-month-old alone. That, she realized, is what those weekly Target outings are about.
“Target?” I thought to myself. “Target? Honey, you haven’t sunk to the depths of toddler entertainment desperation until you become a regular at [...]

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Taking Some Time on Sunday Morning to Honor My Heart

April 20, 2008

I woke up in a cranky mood this morning.
“Great,” Mike said when I informed him of this fact, and I don’t blame him, even though I sort of did at the time. One of the hardest things about being cranky for me is knowing that I am taking it out on him. (I [...]

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What Not Being a Real Buddhist Has Taught Me About Motherhood

April 19, 2008

Last night as I was washing the day’s sippy cups I listened to a podcast of Fresh Air featuring Pico Iyer, who has known the Dalai Lama for 33 years and recently wrote a book about him.
The only one awake in the still house on a soft spring night, fresh from dinner out at Marco’s, [...]

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Why I Can’t Take a Compliment (Even of My Kid)

April 18, 2008

When I picked Jake up from school yesterday, one of his caregivers told me he’d been “doing much better lately.”
Since I thought he’d been doing just fine for some time now, I found this cheery message about as welcome as one of Jake’s epic morning poops.
“Better?” I asked, carefully modulating my voice to sound like [...]

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A Temper Tatrum Teaches Me to Be in the Moment

April 17, 2008

I am feeling deep gratitude for Jake’s* latest temper tantrum.
[*Upon a well reasoned request, I am adopting pseudonyms for those discussed in my stories. Because you never know when I will become a celebrity YogaMamaMe, and we have all read about the need to protect the privacy of celebrities' family members.]
I can’t say I [...]

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How Being Kicked in the Face by a Baby Reminded Me that Energy Is All Around Us

April 16, 2008

I’m really tired right now. And not just because I spent most of the night being hit in the face by my baby.
Usually, when Jake wakes up crying at night, the family engages in a practiced shuffle. Mike and I drag ourselves out of bed. He heads for the daybed in the [...]

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Learning to Let Go of Frustration While Walking Through the Mall with Jake

April 15, 2008

It’s amazing how our children can teach us things even in a place so little conducive to spiritual enlightenment as the Asheville Mall.
The lesson that needed learning began yesterday morning, when Mike more or less demanded I see a doctor. I didn’t put up much of a fight, probably because I was too busy [...]

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Making the Little Choices

April 14, 2008

I’m on my way to the Carl Sandburg house, and wondering if I learned anything at all yesterday.
It was Saturday, I’d been cutting into my work time entertaining relatives, and I really just wanted to stay home and get some work done. Still, there’s a difference between deciding to get some work done and [...]

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Facing Life’s Daily Detours Like Bamboo

April 12, 2008

Yesterday I planned on writing a YogaMamaMe entry even though I really didn’t have time for it.
As a result, I found myself with 10 minutes to go before yoga class began as I threw myself into the car and marveled yet again at how it always seems to be 5 minutes later by the car [...]

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What the Friday Morning Bothered Blues Can Teach You About Time

April 11, 2008

“Is this the kind of day I’m going to have?” I whined as I pinched my fingers in the buckle of Jake’s stroller while rushing to get him to school.
YES! boomed something much bigger than me a few minutes later, when Jake dropped the windshield scraper he so loves to carry to school on my [...]

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Grandma Versus Jack’s School, or Trusting Myself as a Mother

April 10, 2008

I didn’t apologize to Jake’s grandmother for taking him to school today. This is a sign, I believe, of progress.
An awful lot of what I’ve done as a mother is apologize — for decisions I’ve made as a mother (sure, everyone tells you you’re right because you’re the mom, but do you ever really [...]

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When Family Visits Cross Paths with Our Personal Journeys

April 8, 2008

Any moment now, my mother-in-law, sister-in-law, and niece are going to arrive at my house.
I am, I report with pleasure and a little bit of pride, not in complete meltdown mode, despite just now sitting down to write when there’s really no time left to do so. While this was my priority when I [...]

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Honoring Where Your Heart Has Taken You

April 7, 2008

I was sitting at the local ball park with Mike and Jake yesterday, enjoying the spring day and the buzz of peanuts and beer and baseball gloves, when “Here Comes the Sun” came over the loudspeakers.
Normally, I resist writing essays built around a song that someone else has written. (I haven’t ever written [...]

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Judge the Man in the Red Yoga Shorts only if You Are Ready for Him to Judge You

April 5, 2008

The man in the red yoga shorts was in class again on Thursday. I wasn’t the only one looking.
None of us, I assure you, were staring with pleasure. He was wearing the traditional yoga shorts that no doubt were the inspiration for European bathing trunks, the kind regretfully worn only by old German [...]

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